This is the first time I've given a critique so I'm sorry if I come across as unkind. This piece reminds me very much of my first attempts at calligraphy. Interesting choice of word. It's certainly not one that's commonly seen.
The balance of the characters looks nice. Many of the strokes are well positioned for a beginner, although some are too long and the ends of some strokes look strange.
One thing though, is that the horizontal strokes are too, well, horizontal. I think many beginners do this, especially those for whom Japanese is a second language. I can understand why, considering how many Japanese teachers teach kanji and how kanji are printed in dictionaries. Unfortunately, it gives the impression of a character on a computer screen. This is somewhat exasperated here by the thin strokes. Horizontal strokes in calligraphy actually curve slightly upwards on the right side.
Overall, I think this is quite good for a first experience at calligraphy. If you are interested in learning more, I would highly recommend it.